Vancouver Coastal Health (VCH) runs a blog with the name “Up For Discussion” and they recently published an article by their CEO Dr. David Ostrow titled “It is time to have The Conversation” about end of life care. I applaud them for starting discussions about very complex and difficult topics that touch on ethical, legal ...

This post sat in my drafts for a long time. I was struggling to complete it because I did not really know where to go with it. Then I came across another blog post by Sarah and it suddenly made sense to me because she described it so beautifully. Here is how I started. How ...

A common belief is that grief and bereavement kill all happiness. People who go through tragedy simply cannot be happy, right? I think that might be true for the darkest time after tragedy. I don’t want to put a length on this timeframe because this might feel different for everyone. This is a time when ...

Ever since we started this blog I have been following the many great initiatives that are happening right now to bring attention to the topic of losing a child, in particular stillbirth. It seems like all pieces are coming together to really make a difference. Many people who have lost a child seem to have ...

For the past hour I have tried to write a post about Mother’s Day. I have started and deleted my words. I considered writing about the commercialization of the event and the loss of the true meaning, about why the day might unintentiously feel exclusive to a lot of women, about the origins of the ...

After other parents recommended the book “The year of magical thinking” by Joan Didion, I got it from the library and started reading it. Some of her insights are really fascinating to read. Today I came across this passage. Joan is quoting from Emily Post’s 1922 book of etiquette, Chapter XXIV, Funerals: “Persons under the ...

Every day I am learning more about the constant companion grief. Sometimes there are revelations. I recently recognized that grief is like an armory, maybe even an arsenal. It can be a weapon, like a sword it can hurt and drive people away in fear. Or it can be a shield that I can wrap ...

“How do you start dying all the while trying to make sure that it is the living who will be okay?” This is a quote from Shane Koyczan from a poem he read at a Canuck Place Gala. I encourage you to watch the video. It is just 7 minutes long, but reveals volumes of ...

Many bereaved parents seem to experience the same thing: after they lose a child, their social life changes significantly. And I am not simply talking about going into hiding, avoiding groups of people or staying away from fun events and activities. This is likely true for anyone who grieves the loss of a loved one. ...

Today is the second anniversary of our son’s death. Like last year we will be lighting floating lanterns for him tonight with our close friends. At his first anniversary we were watching the lanterns when a marvelous shooting star appeared. We like to think of it as a sign. Don’t get me wrong. I have ...